Friday, August 17, 2012

I'm Going to Sue You Because I'm a Blithering Idiot

Some people who sue other people in this country are blithering idiots. Jennelle Carrillo us suing the Dallas Cowboys because she burned her bum on a bench outside of Cowboys Stadium. Here are some facts about the bench and the temperature on that bad ass day. The temperature was over 100 degrees and the park bench was black.

For most reasonable people with an average IQ, sitting on a black bench when it's hot out is a no no. I guess Janelle Carrillo had to rest her posterior so badly that she didn't consider the elements. Now that she burned her backside, she wants to pass the blame to someone else. Why not blame a rich owner and team?

When I first heard about the case, I thought it was a joke. Upon further review, I think the lawsuit is frivolous and asinine. In my humble opinion, anyone bringing this type of lawsuit is in need of extensive psychiatric help.

According to the moron's attorney, she realized her bum was hot but didn't realize the significance of the damage until later. I've sat or walked on hot surfaces. It didn't take me long to realize that I should remove myself  from a potentially harmful situation.

Maybe it was the Cowboys fault that it was hot in that day. Maybe it was the Cowboys fault that Carillo is an idiot. Carillo blames the team for not posting a warning. What warning did she want? OK, I get it, the sign should have read: "To all idiots who don't realize that sitting on black bench when it's hot like it is today, don't sit on this bench as you may burn your lazy ass!"

That might have done the trick. Then again, they might have been sued by idiots like Carillo for being called idiots. It's a no win situation. Maybe the cowboys could have employed security to stand by the benches to prevent anyone from sitting on the bench.

I don't like the Cowboys but this lawsuit is one of the dumbest things I've heard of. I think the judge who reads this complaint should throw the case out and order Carillo to attend basic life skills classes. They can start by explaining to this moron that black surfaces attract heat and that she should avoid sitting on these surfaces when it's hot outside.

Then they can have a life lesson on the weather in Dallas. They can instruct this buffoon that the weather gets really hot in Dallas and sitting on any surfaces should be done at her own risk. Carillo should be ordered to pay for these basic life lessons and all legal costs incurred by Jerry Jones and the Dallas Cowboys for defending such a ridiculous claim. I don't live in Dallas but I do know that it gets very hot there.

One thing that I believe is that Carillo is a blithering idiot. She's in need of some serious help, because she seems to lack basic life skills.

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